Friday, March 6, 2009

So Here I Am

So here I am. I've been talking about doing this for months... make that years. I need a place to put my words. I've got all these things/thoughts just flying around in my head and since I can't get them out through my mouth, I thought maybe... just maybe I could put them all down in cyberspace. Where they are safer from prying eyes than if I would put them, say, under my mattress.

Last night I was thinking... how do I do it? How am I juggling being all the things I'm supposed to be. I have 3 awesome kids, one with a learning disability. I have this sweet, loving man... who in a moment of lust/blindness married me on the fourth date. I have friends (granted most of them live in my computer) who I can bear my soul to. And I have... well I guess I'll call it my 'religion'. So how do I manage them all? I don't! At least not all well, all at the same time.

My husband. As I write/type this, he is flying on a 'big aeroplane' as he would say. It's what he does. It's what he loves. I always joke, that if that plane were a woman he would definately leave me for her. He loves his plane, with all her oddities and tempermental problems. He loves her... I mean it. He would be devestated without that plane. He knows it in and out. It's because he is so good at his job that I get to do what I do best. Sit on my rear and do a whole lot of nothing. Or at least it seems like that at the end of the day.

My kids. Three of them. C just turned 9 and it seems like almost every day is a battle. Somewhere along the way he has discovered he is his own person and that mom doesn't rule the universe. Things were so much easier when he thought that I really did hang the moon. When he still thought the sun rose and set because I told it to. Okay well not quite but you get the jist. He's growing up. Turning into this little person that I sometimes don't recognize for all his 'grownupness'. He has his battles (read ADHD), but he has stuck his chin out and met it head on.

J is going to be 3 this month. He is totally different from C. He wants to learn everything he can and conquer every mountain, just as long as I'm there next to him. He is fearless of most things, but not quite ready to let go of my pantleg. We had our first playgroup today, but that is for another time. Another post. J is the lovebug. He is the one who wants to be held, hugged, cuddled, and just 'be' with me. ME!

I is the little lady in the house. She has everyone wrapped around her little drama-queen finger. She's 18 months now and she already has the world at her fingertips. At least she thinks so and none of us are brave enough to tell her otherwise. She thinks she can do anything and usually she does just that. No way my girl is going to let her brothers get the best of her. But at the end of the day, she's looking out the window for daddy. At the end of the day, it's daddy that she wants. At least I got my mama's boys.

So that's my family. There is the reason my sun rises and sets each day. They are my everything. I'm going to stop there before things get really corny.

I'm... well I'm me. I don't make too many apologies about it either. I'm painfully shy in person, but outrageously outspoken once I know you, or if I'm hiding behind my computer. I promise not to be too snarky, sarcastic, or opinionated... at first anyway. I promise not to make too many smart ass comments... in the beginning. More about me later.

1 comment:

  1. It has been nice getting to know you over the last few years Tiff. I know we will only get closer over the years as we grow in this 'mommy' battle together. :) I look forward to reading more, you are so good with words! Maybe I should have you 'edit' my blogs to make them more interesting!